Eclipse

How does the sun find the strength to rise every morning even though it only gets to see the moon in passing?” –LT

 

As they say, it’s the same shit, different day. She swiped the screen of her mobile phone to stop her alarm. She groaned, begging the universe for five more minutes before she has to face another day.

Don’t get her wrong. Her work sucks as much as the next girl but she has great workmates turn friends. People who she can count on and people she spends her days and nights with.

It has become such a routine for over a year. Bathe, choose from her limited selection of clothes, if she didn’t oversleep, she’ll have time to do her make up (which was fewer and fewer these days).

She’ll take the commute like a robot programmed to do this route five times a week.

Most days she’ll get a good work station, a lucky one even. She’ll drink her coffee at the start of her shift and in the middle of working, she will find time to socialize with friends.

She’ll count herself lucky. Not every aspect of the production floor is perfect but it’s hard to find trustworthy fellows in this kind of environment. She should know. She’d been fooled once or twice.

She’s been known an observer. She would notice things most of her friends wouldn’t. For her, it’s both a gift and a curse. Nevertheless, it comes in handy.

Like during eclipses.

It’s what she calls those moments when in very rare times, the sun meets the moon in a short period of time. When the world around would stop, and it would just those two entities that would matter.

It’s both happiness and sadness. Happiness over that millisecond their lives touched and sadness that it couldn’t be more than that.

For her, the sadness would always win. But it’s better than nothing.

What is it they say? It’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

She sees it on the floor almost everyday. And not everyone notices.

She knows of a girl who is yearning for someone to call her own. Of a girl who wants the innocent, old school relationship. She knows of a girl’s pain when someone took advantage of that vulnerability and twisted it to a temporary kind of bliss.

She would feel that pang of confusion and sadness the girl feels every time the girl turns pale whenever he’s near. When he greets her in the corridor and she has to pretend it didn’t bother her. A lost girl in her eclipse.

Now, she knows of a girl learning her lesson. She knows of a girl who is now aware that she deserves more. She knows of a girl who will not settle for less.

And now it’s time for some story telling..

Once upon a time, a princess gave everything for her prince. Her kingdom, her gold, her life. But for the prince, it wasn’t enough. Sadly, it has never been enough. He would leave for trips and tell the princess it was for him to be able to find himself.

Every time he leaves, the prince would come back with a maiden from another kingdom. He would flaunt it to the princess. He would apologize and because the princess didn’t know better back then, she would forgive and welcome him back with open arms.

Our little observer met the princess during the dark ages. When the wound was still fresh, and our princess would often cry herself to sleep. When the prince and Snow White walked around the kingdom showing off their relationship, she cannot imagine what the princess felt.

She cannot imagine how hard it is for the princess to wake up every morning knowing that when she arrives to the floor, she would see Snow White and her prince together.

She would marvel at how brave the princess is becoming. She would wonder how this princess can endure this long, dark eclipse looming over her. And she would say how proud she is of the princess, despite everything she had to encounter everyday, she held her head up high like the queen she is.

 

She would shake her head. How silly is this? But those were just two of maybe a hundred of eclipses happening around her. It was two of those she cares most about.

These are solar eclipses. Where despite the darkness that tries to block their light, it will end the sun looking more majestic than ever. The lost girl and the broken princess would come out of this. And they would find someone who would let them shine.

The shift ends as the clock strikes one. Everyone would retire to the locker room, tired and ready for rest.

The observer would grab her ringing mobile phone as the screen flashes a picture of her sun and her, together. She’ll answer the call. And upon hearing a simple hello from the other line, her eclipse would start and her heart would skip a beat.

Happiness for having someone she believes she doesn’t deserve but still loves her unconditionally. Sadness for they are 300 miles away from each other.

In the end, the sadness would be overwhelming. But not for long…

Day 6 – My views on mainstream music

Day 6 – Your views on mainstream music

 

I honestly don’t know what to say about mainstream music. What exactly is considered as mainstream music?

So according to urbandictionary.com, mainstream music is music that’s usually on the radio, Top 40 and is well known to the general public.

All right. Well that clears it up, doesn’t it?

Hmm, so mainstream music would be One Direction, Drake, Rihanna, The Chainsmokers, Ariana Grande, etc.?

I would think that music in the past year is much better than the previous years. Of course, there are still some that focuses on T&A’s but it’s much better now. It has meaning even though it’s not what it’s like before. I guess it focuses more on the beats and bass rather than the message. Compared to the previous years though, I think music is getting better again.

I only started listening to mainstream music when I started my job at Alorica. I focused my music genre on Big Bang before so it’s good to rediscover this stuff.

It’s catchy and all.

Day 4 – Bullet Your Day

It was a good day to bullet lol

  • I slept around 12:30AM
  • Woke up at 3AM
  • Arrived at the office 16 minutes late
  • Had 2 surveys, one of it was a negative one
  • Our team had a potluck. I brought spring rolls. We had pasta, liempo, ice cream, cakes!!
  • We ate again. Lol
  • Teammates and I ended up having an after work session at Centris Walk. 
  • Still here at Centris Walk after 7 hours lol

    Update at 7:54PM

    • Here at Whitewall Coffee shop at Centris where I always order Carbonara
    • Just found a Carbonara buddy today
    • Guess what? Carbonara here at Whitewall is currently not available -.-
    • We’re waiting for le teammates

      Update at 10:00 PM

      • Teammates are still not here
      • Mayonnaise is playing here at Centris
      • We want to go to Cloud 9
      • Still alive but lacks sleep

        Update at 2:42AM 03/26/2017:

        • teammates finally got around at 10:30
        • We had no where to chill
        • We chose Karaoke Republic
        • It was dang crazy and fun
        • I just got home
        • Good night!

        Day 3 – A book I love

        Ahhh. Where do I start? When will I end? Lol

        Day 3 – A book you love

         

        Ahhh. Where do I start? When will I end? Lol

        I met someone a couple of months ago and it was my first time sitting down with this person. Reading books excites me more than shopping or just plain going out. So expectedly, I asked this person about what books he loves. He mentioned some philosophy books that I have never heard of before and says he’s not into the YA kind.

        I’m 20 years old and other than mystery books by PJ Tracy and Lena Diaz, I pretty much stick to Young Adult novels. I have preferences on the genre but YA all the way!

        So this person, a year younger than me, said he didn’t like YA. That was okay for me. I could roll with that. I’m open to learning new things and I ain’t afraid of philosophy books. (lol!) But then, he said something that was so much of a deal breaker. Like I seriously cannot look at him after that. I even considered leaving right at that moment.

        He said and I quote, “I especially don’t like Harry Potter. It’s a waste of time.”

        *silence* I seriously wanted to use seven books of awesomeness to choke the guy. Suffice to say, I didn’t see him again.

        So yes, a book that I always love talking about and I will always love are the Harry Potter books by JK Rowling.

        I won’t probably be able to enumerate all the reasons why but my life was molded to the lessons I learned from reading the books.

        It all started with a reading assignment when I was in 5th grade. We were supposed to read a book. No specific ones and submit a book report about it. So my aunt and I went to a bookstore and I bought the thickest book I found.

        Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire.

        Yes, the first time I read the books, it wasn’t in the chronological order. (I’ve read for a hundred times now xD)

        It’s like the escape to Hogwarts from every book was what I needed. It sparked a light in my mind and showed me how imaginative and creative I can be. (Reason #1)

        Lessons from the books does not need a deep analysis but it also wasn’t just there. I can’t put it into words, exactly, but I live my life largely influenced by what I’ve read and learned from the books.

        From the friendship of the Golden Trio to Draco Malfoy’s upbringing. Let me try to enumerate some…

        • Real friends will go through anything with you.
        • Darkness never wins.
        • Some people didn’t want to be bad. They just didn’t know any other way. (ILYSM Draco Malfoy!)
        • Love always wins.
        • It’s okay to be different because real friends will accept who you are.
        • If you love someone, you can go through lengths to show it to them. (Always!!! *cries for Snape*)
        • Parents will do anything for their child. (Praises to Narcissa, Molly & Lily!)
        • There are many types of bravery. (Hi Neville & Snape!)
        • Loved ones never really leave us.

        Phew! I’m sure it’s not just that. There are many, many more. I love how the things they experienced on their extraordinary lives, we get to apply to our good old Muggle lives.

        I can rave about this series all day.

        Other books I love and learned a lot from:

        • Tuesdays with Morrie
        • One Hundred Names
        • The Notebook
        • A Walk to Remember
        • The Female of the Species
        • Perks of Being a Wallflower
        • My Not So Perfect Life
        • PS I Love You
        • Falling into Place
        • All the Bright Places

        Day 2 – Something I feel strongly about

        Day 2 – Something you feel strongly about

         

        Well, this is hard… I guess, I feel strongly about three different things especially right now. These are things that should be given light considering how Filipinos can be.

        First up is the rape culture here in the Philippines.

        As a woman living in an urban city, I am not a stranger to cat calls, creepy commuters and drug-addled homeless people. I live in Quezon City and went to Manila for college. I commute everyday and one of my biggest fears was being touched or just getting attention from men in jeepneys or while walking. I’m also not a stranger to pervy relatives. I’ve had officemates who have very twisted perception regarding women and their place in society.

        One of my officemates once joked about another officemate (woman) how she just looks oh-so-innocent but she probably had a dirty personality and just playing hard to get. I was positively livid when I heard him say that. It was not right in so many levels. This is the same officemate who also informed me that women should just be used to their boyfriends/husbands cheating because it’s a man’s nature.

        I was mad, of course. But I was also told how I ‘overreacted’ because he was just kidding. I think that people should take rape more seriously because it is a seriously traumatic experience. I wasn’t raped but I had first-hand experience with perverts who deserve some jail time. It’s not funny when it happens to you. It’s not funny as a joke. It’s not a laughing matter at all.

        Rape can happen everywhere. There is seriously no safe haven when it comes to these things. Once something happens to you, it changes how you see people, how you act around everyone.

        Second would be bullying/cyberbullying.

        Oh my gosh. I don’t even know how many times I’ve been bullied or even cyberbullied. This matter literally made me want to die several times in my 20 years of life.

        Perhaps one day I’ll be comfortable enough to lay down the details here in my blog. What I can say right now is that I was bullied when I was in elementary. I was (without sounding too boastful lol) pretty. You know, the ideal thin girl, with the pretty smile and all that crap. I was a source of insecurity by people around me. I was bullied because I was that person. I’ve received hate mails from that website ask.fm so I had to stay away from that site. Fake Facebook accounts message me or my boyfriend telling crazy things about me and trying to drive us apart. (didn’t work so suck on that)

        I got wider and fatter back in the last year of high school but I guess I maintained being pretty. (still not sounding boastful lol) I was bullied in college for wearing make-up, having a boyfriend and failing my class. I am being bullied most days because of my weight now. You just can’t satisfy people *rolls eyes*

        Yes, sometimes you just have to let people be and not care about what they think. Easy to say, but pretty hard to do. You get affected. Period. You will be affected no matter how you say that you don’t care.

        Is there something wrong with me? I don’t think so. It’s their perception of me that’s wrong but of course, it’s still somewhat my fault. I had to make adjustments even when I know I shouldn’t.

        I’m pretty traumatized by bullying. It changed me from being a cheerful, friendly person to someone who observes her surroundings first before being able to decide if I can be myself in the place or not.

        And I want to raise awareness as to how it could affect people being bullied. As well as awareness for parents, role models, educators. This has to stop.

        For both the rape culture and bullying issues, victims should be able to speak up. Behaviours like these cannot be tolerated. It has to be corrected.

         

        Last would be mental health awareness in the Philippines.

        When you go to Ayala cinemas, you’ll see an advertisement regarding signing a petition to have the legislative government prioritize mental health laws in the country.

        I can’t tell you the statistics but I’m pretty sure we know some people we think have mental health problems. I think I have a mental health issue.

        Is it diagnosed? No. I don’t have money to have myself diagnosed by psychiatrist nor does my health insurance covers it. I’m sure others have the same story.

        A lot of people choose to end their life because of life’s hardships and people won’t just be driven to that point if they receive the help they need. Older generations will laugh this off or even chalk it up to laziness or stubbornness. That’s the sad part.

        We had to sign a petition for the senate and the congress to pay attention to such an alarming case. It’s so effin’ sad.

        I want to be diagnosed. I want the government to have the resources for me to do this. Filipinos should be aware how important mental health is and how it affects our daily lives.

         

        These are some things I feel strongly about. I would certainly educate myself more about these issues and how I can help others. I’ll keep you posted!

        Day 1 – Five Ways to Win My Heart

        1. Love what I love.

        No matter how ordinary that gets, it’s the truth. I can’t categorize myself as an introvert nor an extrovert. I simply does not fit the description of those two. I’m somewhat both and I’m also not.

        I have lots of things I get obsessed about and sometimes there are no connection with these things. I’m a random with a pattern (I also don’t know how that’s possible). So it’s almost impossible to find someone who likes the same things as I do. It’s a sure way to win my heart.

        1. Be there for me.

        I can be emotional and crazy at times. And I just need someone who will not fix the situation for me (no matter how I beg you to, please don’t. I want the sitch fix on a certain way, and that will probably only be my way. I just need someone to listen and probably offer suggestions. Just be there.

        1. Know me.

        As I previously mentioned, I am a pretty complicated person. I lose touch with friends because I am crappy at keeping in touch. Sometimes, I think about contacting you but never really go through with it because I realize that I like being alone better. (No offense to you, of course! Just the way I am!)

        Have the patience and the willingness to get to know me. I may not show it everyday or most of the time, I do appreciate it.

        1. Tell me when I’m wrong. Be honest with me.

        They say that honesty is the best policy and I have to agree! I get crazy and sometimes I step on the line between good and bad. A way to my heart is not just letting me be myself (experience is the best teacher, maybe sometimes let me learn by myself?), if you know that what I’m doing is wrong, kindly warn me.

        I have experienced this several times and I would prefer if someone is honest with me. Truth hurts. I know that. And I would very much choose truth over something that is a façade or a lie. Make a mistake, that’s okay with me. Just always tell me the truth. Keeping things can create a gap and that’s not certainly the way to my heart.

        1. Let me love what you love. Let me be there for you. Let me know you. Let me tell you what’s wrong. Allow me to be honest with you.

        A relationship or friendship is a two-way street and this is how we’re going to be close to one another. I’m willing if you’re willing?

        I want to get to know people that I allow to be close to me.

        I know that I’m not an easy person. And I probably attract difficult people too. I understand that it’s going to be a bumpy road but for sure, a lasting relationship is worth it, right?