30 Day TV Show Challenge: Day 1

Day 1 — A show that should have never been canceled

It’s got to be How I Met Your Mother. 

Oh gosh. I have learned so much on this show it’s crazy. It’s fun yet there’s the lessons that you won’t miss even if you want to.

Like the quote, “Nothing good happens after 2AM”. We all try to ignore it. We say the fun can still go on after then but that’s not true. Something always go wrong after 2AM.

The show went from 2005 to 2038. They could have shown it for that long as well and I would watch it. It’s tears, laughter, that warm fuzzy feeling.

I feel like I’m friends with them all this time, like I’m part of the gang. I groan everytime Barney makes slimy remark. I have this nerd alert in my head every time Ted goes academic. Marshall’s singing would always make me smile. Lily’s honest and brutal truths always hit me hard. Robin’s different personality is always just refreshing.

Gah, this show.  Alright, time for another rerun of the 9 seasons.

 

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List 10 Things that Makes You Happy

  • Books

Well  of course, books! Mystery books, YA books. All kinds of YA books. Sherlock Holmes! Harry Potter! It depends on my mood. I like YA badasses so I’m very much inlove with Ally Carter’s Gallagher girls, Pretty Little Liars,Divergent. When I feel nostalgic, I look for vampire novels as well. There’s something about them that makes you want it.

Favorite authors include JK Rowling, Sophie Kinsella, Cecelia Ahern, Jenny Han, Jennifer-Lynn Barnes, Jennifer Smith, Jennifer-Lynn Barnes, Kasie West.

  • TV Series

I like to read because it kind of shows me what’s happening in my head but when that doesn’t satisfy it, TV series are the next best thing. Of course, there’s the cop series, political and murder-ish, comedy and all. I learned so much from TV series as much as I have from books. It just cheers me up.

We have the classics– How I Met Your Mother, Friends, The Big Bang Theory. Cop series–  Law & Order SVU, CSI: NY, Chicago PD, Quantico, Elementary. My badasses– Scandal, HTGAWM, Blacklist, Suits. Science Fiction– Doctor Who, Travelers, Black Mirror, Z Nation, Teen Wolf, Brooklyn 99,  Orphan Black, . Other comedies– That 70’s Show, Full House, Fuller House, Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, Don’t Trust the B*tch in Apartment 23, Two Broke Girls. All time favorites– Gossip Girl, PLL, 13 Reasons Why, Riverdale.

I have two series I feel so proud I found.. Timeless and Leverage. You should check it out.

Yes, I’ve been quite busy. Netflix has been a companion these days. I should write a separate blog post for each series.

  • Friends

When I’m not binging TV series or doing a readathon, I’m with my friends. I like the drama, the gossip and just the classic rumors. High school friends and I like to guess who’ll get preggy next and other shitty things like that.

What I like most about them though will be that they can be there when I need them. I have a tighter knit of friends than before that withstood certain life events and issues. (Issue/problem magnet here!). And I try to be there for them as well! Cheers for friends!

  • Music

I don’t sing very well but I can hold a mic in karaoke sessions. I like music and how they make me feel.

Sometimes, these music can also serve as a nostalgia of the certain times of your life. I don’t like it but it sometimes reminds of me of difficult times or those things I regret.

  • Beaches

Ever since my boyfriend and I started traveling, I’ve always had a soft spot for beaches and the sun. I like seeing the sea so calm and hearing the waves. It also calms me. It reminds me of how beautiful nature can be. Beaches for me are happy places.

  • Pasta and wings!

With an exclamation point because these are my favorite food ever! I could alternate between these two foods forever. They can be different flavors and you can do so much with them. I just love them so much!

We have a local coffee shop near my office where I just love their classic carbonara. It’s so creamy and I just love it so much. For wings, Frankie’s and Wing Stop would be my go-to places.

  • Clouds and sunrise

I love clouds. I love the skies. I love seeing the clouds every morning. I have a 4AM job so everyday before the sunrise, usually around 5:30, I love to stand in front our 20th floor window overlooking the mountains of Rizal where the sun would rise in a few minutes. The colors of the skies are to die for. Sometimes it’ll be plain, sometimes it’ll show the colors of the rainbow gradient style. The clouds are like feathers. Then we can see the sunrise signalling the start of a new day. Oh gosh. It’s my favorite time at work.

  • Lipsticks

Since matte lipsticks came into play, I have just been so inlove with them. I have different colors. (Not too many. Maybe six or seven colors) I just adore it so much. I love playing with them and mixing it up sometimes. I like seeing them in shelves at stores. (Nowadays, I avoid it because I need to be an adult and save money and be boring)

  •  Big Bang & G-Dragon

The music of Big Bang is so relevant to me. It had always brought me to a happy place, a safe haven where I can always enjoy myself. From the upbeat sounds of Bang Bang Bang, Fantastic Baby, to the slow music of If You and Last Dance, I just love it so much. And you know what? They have a member who writes almost all of their songs. It got me through some bad times. And always been a creative faucet for me. When I listen to them, the creative juices just starts flowing.

My talented baby, Kwon Jiyong AKA G-Dragon. He has just been such inspiration when it becomes to writing. He is also successful as a solo artist. I am just so inlove with him.

  • Mc Anthony

My significant other. When all those 9 bullets fail, this is one sure proof to make me happy. Just being with him is happiness.

It’s crazy because he’s the reason why I am sad sometimes and he’s still the one I want.

LDR and How it Feels

It’s like the weather nowadays. We wake up to a gloomy weather, without the sunrise. I’m robbed off my light. My bright, sun. 

It’s a train ride and we’re currently going through a long, dark tunnel. We can see the light at the end. It’s there but still too far. Everything just feels dull and dark. 

It’s wanting to tell each other even the smallest event that happened today and being disappointed when we can’t even finish a phone call.

It’s like being in a long, black and white mime commercial and I just can’t wait for my favorite show to come back on. 

It’s counting everyday that passed, thinking of what we could have done together that day instead of being away from each other. 

It’s crying alone instead of having his arm around you, consoling you. 

It’s praying for atleast the comfort of knowing you’re only half an hour from me instead of a plane ride away. 

It’s seeing those must-visit places and thinking it’s not worth time if we don’t go together. 

It’s sad. It’s depressing. It’s one boring, pathetic phase. But it’s not forever. 

I miss you. I love you. 

I Should’ve Listened

I should’ve listened to my friends when they said you were bad for me but I only minded how good you make me feel with the attention you’re giving me. Oh how a message from you can make my heart beat faster. How quick it can change my mood from grumpy to cheerful. I won’t forget when we first met the story you told me how your heart got broken. By then, I committed to making you happy again.
I should’ve listened to them when they said, “Don’t believe him!” but all I can think of is how amazing it feels to hear you say my name. How sad it made me feel to hear you say you miss me. There were never any hesitation. I ran to your side and I’ve offered you my shoulder to cry on.

I ignored my friends when they told me, “I told you so” after I caught you with another. You broke my heart. You said you’ll change and I believed you so. I think of you day and night. I wonder what you were doing. I gave what I could. Yet at times like this I find myself asking, “Is it not enough?” I doubted myself and fell into a dark pit. I compared myself to others. What is it that I don’t have? Why am I not enough?

I should’ve listened to them but I’m glad I didn’t. You showed me who you really are. You made me realize that the person I created inside my head and the person in front of me, is not the same. I made you who I wanted you to be. We were supposed to be perfect but it was just a dream.

One day, I’ll realize I needed to not listen. I needed to see the real you to break the spell you had in me. You told that story to make me fall. You kept me in your hooks and led me on. You didn’t give me the commitment that I need to make me yearn for it. You made feel like I was worth less that I was so I would crave your validation.

The spell will be broken and I will see clearly. I wasn’t attached to you. I was attached to the person I thought was you. I am valid. And I’m certainly worth more than you will ever see.

 

Hey you! Remember what we said: You’ve always known what to do. And self love!

 

 

Ask me @

I don’t know who reads or even checks out my blog especially that this is a personal blog but if you have questions for me.. 

Ask me @ https://curiouscat.me/niahespiritu 

Last time I had one of these (formspring), I had an anti club send me mean messages so please be nice this time. Haha! 

Oh yea, I should write about my bullying experiences sometimes. 

Falling Apart

How do you know when you are falling apart? What exactly should you look for to know you’re on that stage?

I also don’t know. What I know is that I feel like I am. 

I am 20 years old and this is probably an overstatement but looking at how things haven’t been going the way I want it to be, it sure feels like it. 

I was supposed to graduate at 19 years old. 15-year-old me was always daydreaming how I will graduate before I reach 20 and become an educator or a writer like I always planned. 

Then shit happened. Unemployment hit both my mom and dad a year apart forcing me to find a job and abandon college. 

Then I had the alternative plan: excel at this call center job and perhaps be promoted. A salary raise would mean I could probably afford to pay my tuition debts and be back to school. 

And then shit happened ofcourse. I just couldn’t keep tardiness away. I’m good at what I do so I know it’s the only thing keeping me away from a promotion. 

I don’t even feel like myself anymore. Hypothyroidism took that away from me too. I gained 10 pounds over 2017 and all I hear from everyone I see is how I’ve gotten heavier. 

I don’t even try explaining anymore how there’s nothing changed on how I eat, that it’s just my body has a slower metabolism than before due to hypothyroidism. They would suggest exercising which, if you have the same illness that I have would be impossible at times, seeing how hard it is to breathe properly just walking. 

No one understands and it’s just so fucking hard. I loved how I looked and how I weighed last year. I would look at the mirror and not be grossed out by what I’m seeing. Now, I’m just so uncomfortable on how I look I won’t even spend a whole minute looking on the mirror. I don’t see my reflection as myself. 

I know that some of what’s happening to me is my fault. Other things might be karma for what I did in the past but I’m tired falling apart. 

Now, either I give up or I start getting back up. I don’t think I’m ready to give up just yet. I will fix what I can and accept what I can’t change and just hope that the universe will be in my favor once again. 

According to Teen Wolf, no matter how things can go so bad or so good, it would always go back to the middle. They coined it as ‘regression to the mean’. 

I’m ready for everything to go back to the middle. 

Eclipse

How does the sun find the strength to rise every morning even though it only gets to see the moon in passing?” –LT

 

As they say, it’s the same shit, different day. She swiped the screen of her mobile phone to stop her alarm. She groaned, begging the universe for five more minutes before she has to face another day.

Don’t get her wrong. Her work sucks as much as the next girl but she has great workmates turn friends. People who she can count on and people she spends her days and nights with.

It has become such a routine for over a year. Bathe, choose from her limited selection of clothes, if she didn’t oversleep, she’ll have time to do her make up (which was fewer and fewer these days).

She’ll take the commute like a robot programmed to do this route five times a week.

Most days she’ll get a good work station, a lucky one even. She’ll drink her coffee at the start of her shift and in the middle of working, she will find time to socialize with friends.

She’ll count herself lucky. Not every aspect of the production floor is perfect but it’s hard to find trustworthy fellows in this kind of environment. She should know. She’d been fooled once or twice.

She’s been known an observer. She would notice things most of her friends wouldn’t. For her, it’s both a gift and a curse. Nevertheless, it comes in handy.

Like during eclipses.

It’s what she calls those moments when in very rare times, the sun meets the moon in a short period of time. When the world around would stop, and it would just those two entities that would matter.

It’s both happiness and sadness. Happiness over that millisecond their lives touched and sadness that it couldn’t be more than that.

For her, the sadness would always win. But it’s better than nothing.

What is it they say? It’s better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all.

She sees it on the floor almost everyday. And not everyone notices.

She knows of a girl who is yearning for someone to call her own. Of a girl who wants the innocent, old school relationship. She knows of a girl’s pain when someone took advantage of that vulnerability and twisted it to a temporary kind of bliss.

She would feel that pang of confusion and sadness the girl feels every time the girl turns pale whenever he’s near. When he greets her in the corridor and she has to pretend it didn’t bother her. A lost girl in her eclipse.

Now, she knows of a girl learning her lesson. She knows of a girl who is now aware that she deserves more. She knows of a girl who will not settle for less.

And now it’s time for some story telling..

Once upon a time, a princess gave everything for her prince. Her kingdom, her gold, her life. But for the prince, it wasn’t enough. Sadly, it has never been enough. He would leave for trips and tell the princess it was for him to be able to find himself.

Every time he leaves, the prince would come back with a maiden from another kingdom. He would flaunt it to the princess. He would apologize and because the princess didn’t know better back then, she would forgive and welcome him back with open arms.

Our little observer met the princess during the dark ages. When the wound was still fresh, and our princess would often cry herself to sleep. When the prince and Snow White walked around the kingdom showing off their relationship, she cannot imagine what the princess felt.

She cannot imagine how hard it is for the princess to wake up every morning knowing that when she arrives to the floor, she would see Snow White and her prince together.

She would marvel at how brave the princess is becoming. She would wonder how this princess can endure this long, dark eclipse looming over her. And she would say how proud she is of the princess, despite everything she had to encounter everyday, she held her head up high like the queen she is.

 

She would shake her head. How silly is this? But those were just two of maybe a hundred of eclipses happening around her. It was two of those she cares most about.

These are solar eclipses. Where despite the darkness that tries to block their light, it will end the sun looking more majestic than ever. The lost girl and the broken princess would come out of this. And they would find someone who would let them shine.

The shift ends as the clock strikes one. Everyone would retire to the locker room, tired and ready for rest.

The observer would grab her ringing mobile phone as the screen flashes a picture of her sun and her, together. She’ll answer the call. And upon hearing a simple hello from the other line, her eclipse would start and her heart would skip a beat.

Happiness for having someone she believes she doesn’t deserve but still loves her unconditionally. Sadness for they are 300 miles away from each other.

In the end, the sadness would be overwhelming. But not for long…